I Slash Thee

The Great Game: Humorous Summary

Sherlock: FUCK EVERYTHING THE WALL DESERVES MY RAGE AND MY BULLETS
John: sherlOCK WHAT THE FUCK
Mrs Hudson: lover's tiff?
John: FIVE MINUTES INTO THE EPISODE AND ALREADY THE GAY JOKES
John: I HATE YOU BOTH
John: FUCK THIS I'M OUT TO BE HETEROSEXUAL WITH MY HETEROSEXUAL GIRLFRIEND
Sherlock: lol
Wall: :)
Bomb: explodes
-LATER-
John: HOLY I got here as soon as I could Sherlock are you okay Sherlock?
Sherlock: nonchalance
Mycroft: hey gurl just trying to talk my bro into a case
Sherlock: don't call me bro get out of my face you smell fat
-LATER AGAIN-
Lestrade: found you some fanmail also John's blog is hilarious and we all read it
Sally: Someone in the office has been posting anonymous fanfiction for it on the staff bulletin-
Lestrade: SO SHERLOCK THIS PHONE HMM THIS PHONE
-SHOES-
Sherlock: SOMETHING IS AFOOT
John: oh you did not just -
Woman: Hello this is your mysterious antagonist. Just thought I'd let you know I'VE STRAPPED A BOMB TO A CIVILIAN AND YOU'RE ON THE CLOCK TO SOLVE A COLD CASE, HAVE FUN BABES.
-LAB-
Molly: SHERLOCK MEET MY BOYFRIEND
Molly: I HAVE BOYFRIEND
Molly: SO THERE
Sherlock: What a flaming homosexual
Molly: you asshole
John: Dick move
Sherlock: ooh John deduce the amount of fucks I give
John:
Sherlock:
John: shoes
Sherlock: aw you are adorable, now let me do the actual deducing YUP SOLVED IT BITCHES
-MORE CASES-
-MEANWHILE-
John: So Mycroft, Sherlock sent me to help because he's basically a dick who exists under the delusion that I'm his personal lackey
Mycroft: Okay, I trust you more than my Secret Service anyway
John: INVESTIGATING
Sherlock: YOU ARE SO CUTE WHEN YOU TRY TO DO THAT
John: AND LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, AWARD FOR THE BIGGEST ASSHOLE IN LONDON GOES TO
John: I can't believe you there are LIVES AT STAKE
Sherlock: Do I need to get out my violin?
John: JDFKOEFIDNFDKDIFD
Sherlock: Well there's no need to get testy
-LATER-
John: Right I'm going out
Sherlock: Cool I'll get the groceries
John: -and in hindsight I probably should have realised then that something was amiss-
-AT THE POOL-
Sherlock: I HAVE THE USB BITCH I KNOW YOUR EVIL PLAN
John: well butter my rump and call me toast
Sherlock: wh
Sherlock: John?
John: bomb vest
Sherlock: okay shit just got personal
Moriarty: THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU DON'T TEXT PEOPLE BACK
Sherlock: You're too Irish to be scary
Moriarty: I WILL SODOMISE AND FACE-FUCK YOU
Sherlock: ok I don't like this game any more
John: I'LL HOLD HIM DOWN, RUN MY LOVE
Sherlock:
Moriarty:
John:
John: I meant Sherlock. Sherlock is the thing I meant.
Moriarty: CLOSE BUT NO CIGAR
LASER LIGHTS OF DEATH
Sherlock: well fuck
Moriarty: loolz bye sexyface catch you later
Sherlock: -be smooth, be smooth-
Sherlock: JOHN U OK
John: I'm fine
Sherlock: ARE YOU ALRIGHT
John: Sherlock, just - you're unclothing me what am I awake
Sherlock: sliding the bomb away
John: oh right well that was embarrassing perhaps I shouldn't have tilted my head back like that
Both: nervous giggling
Moriarty: LOL JOKES I'M BACK. AND I'M GONNA KILL YA.
Moriarty: SURPRISE
Sherlock: then I shall sHOOT THE BOMB
Moriarty: deathstare
Sherlock: deathstare
Lasers: deathstare
John: hoooly fuck.
Steven Moffat: yes
Steven Moffat: do you like this?
Steven Moffat: are you invested?
Steven Moffat: ready?
Steven Moffat: CLIFFHANGER
Mark Gatiss: haha greatest

6,756 notes ♕ Reblog ♕ 10 months ago

Posted on July 9th at 9:42 AM
Reblogged from: lesbianna
Originally posted by: teacupsandcyanide